Proverbs - Chapter 25

¹⁵ By long forbearance a ruler is persuaded, and a gentle tongue breaks a bone.

In another earlier proverb, we read where a soft tongue turns away wrath or anger.  Self control, along with patience, using a gentle tongue can win over the hearts of those around us in ways that nothing else can.

• On the other hand, the same tongue given at the right moments can break through where nothing else that people could say could have that kind of effect on someone.
• I remember a saying as a child which actually is not true, but spoken regardless.  "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me."  Yes, words can hurt terribly when spoken at a vulnerable time in a person's life.

What I am saying is this:  There is power in the tongue - both to heal and to tear down.  As such, we must always guard our mouth so that the words that come out will be edifying to the souls of others.

Overindulgence

¹⁶ Have you found honey?  Eat only as much as you need, lest you be filled with it and vomit.  ¹⁷ Seldom set foot in your neighbor’s house, lest he become weary of you and hate you.

King Solomon was trying to convey that overindulgence in anything, including good things can be harmful to us. 

• He first uses the analogy of honey and how it is sweet and pleasant to the taste.  It should be enjoyed, but only eat as much as is needed.  For if you overindulge, it will turn on you and be harmful and counterproductive, even to the point of you vomiting it back up because our bodies are telling us that it is rejecting it.  Moderation is the key here, which is wisdom for many things in life.
• In the same way, wisdom tells us that  the wise man or woman must be sensitive to not abuse a relationship of a neighor by constantly being at their door.  Too much of a good thing can turn on us.  Being at their door continuously, the neighbor will become weary of you and purposely try to avoid being around you.  Wisdom then tells us that we must all be on guard to not be over-neighborly to where we wear out our welcome with them; for if we do, it will have an adverse effect on us to where our neighbor may even turn on us.  

Untrustworthy People in Your Life

¹⁸ A man who bears false witness against his neighbor is like a club, a sword, and a sharp arrow.  

A false witness is a dangerous person to have in your life - for he or she can do much damage in a court of law, or even in a simple conversation when used to gossip against you.  King Solomon is expressing here that the damage of a false witness is like a club, sword, or a sharp arrow and has the ability to kill you.  The tongue is a viscious evil that has the ability to destroy and God hates it. 

Verse 19 tells us not to trust someone untrustworthy in times of trouble.  

¹⁹ Confidence in an unfaithful man in time of trouble is like a bad tooth and a foot out of joint.

• A bad tooth and a foot out of joint is painful and harmful for you.

²⁰ Like one who takes away a garment in cold weather, and like vinegar on soda, is one who sings songs to a heavy heart.

 There are people that no matter what they do or say, they bring discomfort to others.  They can be compared to such things as taking away a person's garment from when it is cold - that is cruel. 

• Another example that King Solomon used was pouring vinegar upon soda, which is extremely acidic.  One destroys the other.
• Then King Solomon concludes by saying that the one who ignores a heavy heart by singing gaity music can only irritate the one with the heavy heart.   

Everyone - we are called to edify, not tear down others.  We need to be sensitive to those who are hurting and purpose to minister life to them.

Have you ever heard of the phrase "heaping coals of fire on their head?"  Let's talk about that!

²¹ If your enemy is hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he is thirsty, give him water to drink;  ²² For so you will heap coals of fire on his head, and the Lord will reward you.

As both Old and New Covenant believers, we have been called to give out love, and even care for our enemy if need be.  If he is hungry, feed him.  If he is thirsty, give him some water to drink.  While it is human nature to hate our enemies and hope the worst for them, we instead need to love on them.  We do that by reaching out to their needs.  

• When we heap coals of kindness, which tells them that we still care for them, it puts the enemy in a position of embarrassment, not knowing how to handle the situation. 
• Purposed acts of kindness to an enemy will not only bring on rewards from the Lord, but it puts the enemy in a position, where he does not know how to handle you. 
• The whole purpose, however, in putting heeping coals on their head is to bring them to a point of remorse, regretting what they did to you.  Then hopefully, at that point, you and your enemy are able to work through the issue at hand, or the enemy simply changes his behavior toward you.  He knows that revenge will only bring on more kindness, and he can't handle that!

The moral of the story here is when others have wronged us, we need to come to the point of pity (compassion) on them, knowing what they may have to face in their future judgment from God.  Then when our heart is right, having compassion on them, we find ourselves lifting them up in prayer for God to do a work in their life to bring about that remorse for what they did.  Hopefully, this will stop any form of future wtong. 

When or if God leads you, then you can humbly help them through what they have done to you. 

And then lastly, speaking of untrustworthy people, verse #23 says:

²³ The north wind brings forth rain, and a backbiting tongue an angry countenance.

As a matter of cause and effect when someone backbites another, it often done in anger, which them brings on anger in the listener.  The listener does not want to hear or get involved in the bitterness of the backbiter.  

²⁴ It is better to dwell in a corner of a housetop, than in a house shared with a contentious woman.

This is a repeat of two other scripture verses, showing us the importance of doing what we can to make homes a place of refuge where its dwellers look forward to coming home to.  Nobody wants to live within a house that is contentious from others living there.  As was brought out before, it is generally the woman who makes a house into a home where everybody can be a peace and enjoy living there.

²⁵ As cold water to a weary soul, so is good news from a far country.

In biblical times, news from a far away country came very slowly - generally by horseback.  When they received good news, especially from a far country, it brought joy and excitement because it was not an everyday occurance, and something the people had been waiting a long time to hear.  It could be compared to being given cold water when you are thirsty and weary - it brought excitement and refreshment.  

²⁶ A righteous man who falters before the wicked is like a murky spring and a polluted well.

It is a very sad thing when a righteous person backslides away from the Lord.  The wicked expected the righteous to stay righteous, but when they fall, it is even more because the name of the Lord has been violated.  Satan will then take advantage of the situation to drag people down under his control.  As such, many people give up on God during those times when the weak believers fall.   King Solomon compares it to a thirsty person in a desert seeing a well off in a distance.  He looks excitely upon receiving its waters.  When it is nothing but a murky spring or polluted well, there is no help, and an extreme disappointment because his hope of his thirst being quenched has diminished.

• What then does that tell us as New Covenant believers?  In a day when Satan roams around like a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour, we as believers in Christ, need to remain strong in the Lord.  The last thing we want is to adversely affect someone who has been searching for God, or a new believer to stumble themselves because we faltered in our faith.  To know that we could actually turn someone away from the Lord is a very sobering thought.  How horrible that would be.
• So let's remain close to the Lord, leaning on Him so the devil cannot get a foothold into our lives.

²⁷ It is not good to eat much honey; so to seek one’s own glory is not glory.

We learned just a few verses ago that it is not good to eat too much honey.  Nothing sweet beyond that what is in moderation is what our body can handle.  If eaten in excess, the sweetness of honey can turn on us to where our body rejects it and we throw it up. 

• In the same way, we need to guard against seeking our own glory by practice humility.   Luke 14:11 tells us that when we humble ourselves, we will be exalted.  But for those who exalt themselves, they will be humbled.  
• While glory feels good, we need to be assured (from Rom 8:18) that a day will come when we see Christ that we will be glorified.

²⁸ Whoever has no rule over his own spirit is like a city broken down, without walls.

Self control is one of the fruits of the Spirit according to Galatians 5:22-23.  Many people, however, have so little self control over themselves, to where it can be said that they have no rule over their own spirit.  Their spirits become like a city broken down, having no walls, leaving the city defenseless.  When there are no walls, then the enemy comes in like a flood to devour. 

• There is an old saying that we can be our worst enemy.  While there is truth in that statement when we take away our own self control, it tells us the importance of making sure the fruit of the Spirit in operational in our lives.

 ^{Gal 22} But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, ²³ gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.